7 Things I Learned By Listing My Fears

A week back I wrote my fears and emailed them to 4 of my friends. Actually we had this activity where everyone in team wrote his fears (personal + business) and shared with the whole group. I wrote few things like: I’m afraid of:

  • of what I say. I feel bad, really bad when I don’t fulfil my words
  • of being left alone
  • being lived in very backward part of the world (but I love it)
  • of my past, which has nothing not do with future
  • getting insulted in public, for any mistakes which I made some three years back
  • having no money
  • my bad English.
  • etc etc.
  • publishing this post (it just came into my mind.)

Here is what I learned from this valuable and (what seemed very difficult at first, but) easy exercise.
1. Some of the fears we have are real, but at the same time the solution is so just on the opposite side of the fear. But we get frightened and do not look at fears for solutions.
2. If you have fear of something, it means you can 100% counter that fear. You posses all the tools, power and whatsoever, fear doesn’t exist without solution.
For example, I’m afraid of not having money, but at the same times. I have abilities to address this. And why I am not afraid of losing the US President election, because I am not interested. That fear is around Obama and other people who’re affiliated with Presidency.
Or you can add other example: Fear of Publishing this post once it is completed. I’m only having this fear now, today, never before. Because this is first time I’m going to write my fears and tell you about them.

3. The point is, you’re afraid when you’re THINKING to make something. Fear is good. It means you are thinking to make. But only thinking doesn’t make anything, so you need to act. And when you act, you eliminate the fear of getting started. And now you are game.
4. What seems you as your weakness, others see that as your strength. (Taught by Peter)
5. Share your fears with true friends, and they can surely help you in some means to get rid of those fears.
6. Everything what we listed as fear, is not fear anymore. It is just that old ego screaming, taking it last chances to protect status quo.  (Taught be Ivana)
7. Folks at some big corporate world, list their fears and hopes about the new product or task and share with each member. This help them make the best of their abilities and at the same time, it clears minds.
8. Bonus After doing this exercise I look into my fears with a positive approach, rather than making myself sad about being poor or what ever hell. I have not yet listed my Hopes anywhere. But I shall look into making this possible too.
Discussion Points:

What you think of writing your fears, and sharing them with some friends? Have you ever done so? Do you think people should do it at companies or in start-up world? Do you believe it can help you make better use of your brain rather then pumping it with fears. I look forward to your words.

Important and more: If you have never written you fears. Even after reading this post. You’ll just get 17% of what it means to write down fears. To get the rest of 83% you need to do it yourself. Go do it.
Thank you to very good friends Peter, Stiivi and Ivana. Without them I would never know why fears exist. And what the hell it has to do with us. I hope you’ll have this fear of writing your fears. Good Luck!

Also learn:
– Being the first one to cross river
– Getting up in easy way
– Be present even if you are not prepared

What to Do Today, This Week, Month, Year, and Life

What I am going to do. This is the most important decision we make, because deciding once, what we are going to do, shapes everything.

Let’s say you’re going out with family today. It will shape, who you are going to meet with, what you’re going to eat, how much travel you’ll have to do etc etc.

It was 2003, I remember that day. When I happily asked one of my class mate, if his mother is teacher too (my mother is an elementary school teacher for 27 years). He replied, “No, not at all. We don’t allow women to do such (dirty) jobs.”

And I did never talk to him again. 30 years ago, my mother made a choice, at that time there is was only single school for girls in our town and it was an elementary. She waited for an year, to study further, and then eventually with a lot of hard work she became a teacher. And it changed her life.

She was married, and then things went wrong. My father used to live for months far from us, and that time my mother was alone to feed us, our school fees and every little and big things. I believe if she would not be a teacher, then I would be a motor mechanic or something like that instead of a blogger and digital media learner.

Our goals and tasks make all other decision of our life. It is very simple, e.g, am I going to open Facebook in my browser or read a story, or am I going to write a new post. It decides everything.

For example (please make it real —>), if you decide to take care of your family. You’ll have to make decision like these, not to smoke any more, go for a walk. In short you’ll try your best to give a better person to your family.

Writing this blog has helped me a better human. When I decide to write a post, I do. I look into myself how ‘something which I’m going to write/preach’ relates to me. And it helps me change my actions.

Steve was very right, he emphasized on finding exactly what to do. And it worked well for him. Right now, like most of us, your mind is filled with thousand of ‘to do things‘ don’t bother. Just find on what you are going to do, find it, find it.

Because when you’ll decide what you are going to do. It is gonna change everything for you. And it is gonna change you into a better and happier and of course a healthier person.

Do you have any ‘what to do‘ story to share, or/and please share your leading thoughts in the comments below.

Two years back, I watched a documentry on Nation Geographic, Jailed Abroad, a 30 year old black guy was just released from the jail after 5 years in prison. He commented, ‘I have decided to become a better person for my 6 years old daughter and my wife. I think it is never too late.

He was right. It is never too late. Thank you.

PS. I am working on several things including my book (I have no idea how will the book go), this is why blog is lacking new post. Rest is all fine with me, how’re you?

Speaking Truth to Tell a Lie and The Other Way Around

Sometimes we speak lie to state truth. (Artists face it quite often)

And…

Sometimes we speak truth to tell a lie. (Happens with people not often, but as written sometimes)

It is 4:34 am in Pakistan right now, and I did spend whole night before computer and reading a book.

Now if I tell someone intentionally that I didn’t sleep last night, he will perceive Waqas is very hard working. Which is not always true.

Yes sometimes we speak truth to tell a lie.

and the other way around.

What do you say?

Image from here and here.